Real Life Revised...

I've done three blogs in about two weeks...needless to say, there's been a lot of life changes happening. It's been crazy here, but I think it's good. Only time will tell. I just have to trust (and we all know how much I love to trust...)

The house thing is the same! This is a good thing. I have three of the four roommates staying fairly consistently at the house. It still seems really strange to me to think that someone is paying for rent, and then doesn't stay at the place they are paying for. Does this make sense to anyone else or am I on my own in this?

The weather has gone back to "Juneau weather". That means it thinks it's sunny, but there's enough cloud cover to not quite need the sunglasses, and then it rains. Actually it sprinkles, but if you're from SoCal, it rains! But it's not consistent. I rains for about five minutes, quits for ten, rains again for ten, quits for an hour, you get the point. I must say: when Juneau doesn't get rain in a while, the people here get pretty grumpy! They need the rain! I find that I miss it too. I love hanging out in the rain!

I was supposed to start my supervisor position today. Instead, I went to group therapy with my girls and let them know that I was resigning from JYS. They were not happy with me, and cried a little. I tried to explain that I truly do care for them and that I am not quitting because of anything any of them had done, but that it was something that I needed to do for myself. I also told them that I would be checking up on them, and wanted to come by weekly to play games with them and read a book or something. We'll see if I'm a friend or foe tomorrow...

So, I quit my job because I got a new job! I'll still be in Juneau, but working for JAMHI (Juneau Alliance for Mental Health Inc). It is working with adults with psych problems - depression, schizophrenia, psychosis, dual personalities, etc. I'll be a case manager over there, working on treatment plans, getting them to and from appointments, teaching them how to function, etc. Should be interesting and a challenge! If you have more questions, please call me and ask! There's too much to write in a blog...

More changes! This week, I've really been praying and asking God to give me wisdom, endurance, and understanding for all these crazy things in my life. Then, on the radio, a song came up (yes, another song!) Third Day's, "Take It All". Recently I've been struggling with the reality that people are expecting too much of me. I can't be everything to everyone, and it's feeling like that is what is happening. I am so tired of trying so hard. I am tired of people assuming that since I am a "strong" person, I can handle a great deal of things at once. I can, but sometimes (in the midst of life changes...) it's too much. And then I think and wonder how much of this I bring on myself. How much of it is my own expectations of myself? Like I said, it's been a struggle. All that to say, this has been my theme song for the past few days...



Love you and miss you all!
Blessings!

Amazing Grace

Amazing Grace (How sweet the sound)
That sav'd a wretch like me!
I once was lost, but now am found,
Was blind, but now I see.

'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear,
And grace my fears reliev'd;
How precious did that grace appear,
The hour I first believ'd!

Thro' many dangers, toils and snare,
I have already come;
'Tis grace has brought me safe thus far,
And grace will lead me home.

The Lord has promised good to me.
His word my hope secures;
He will my shield and portion be,
As long as life endures.

Yes, when this flesh and heart shall fail,
And mortal life shall cease;
I shall profess, within the vail,
A life of joy and peace.

The earth shall soon dissolve like snow,
The sun forbear to shine;
But God, who call'd me here below,
Will be for ever mine.

I think I've known this song my entire life. I can't remember a time I haven't known this song. When I was young, I remember really didn't like this song: it was too old, the melody was the same, it was LONG, and I didn't really understand the words. I used to cringe when the music people at church started to play this song. When I had to learn it on the piano for piano lessons, I think I practiced this song the least. I really hated this song!

I watched the movie this morning for the second time. What an incredible testimony! Both for William Wilberforce and for John Newton. They changed lives and changed history! Their honesty and determination changed lives and made them better. I want to be like them. I want the endurance and the honesty and the will to change lives like they did.

I could sit here and pick apart the verses of this song. They are so true; so solid; so deep; so beautiful. I look back and realize that my hating this song really did nothing for me. All the times that I missed out on singing with those that have gone before me: "Amazing grace! How sweet the sound! That saved a wretch like me!" But as I sing them now, I stand in amazement of God's grace. His love, His grace, is what has saved me. I am not worthy, but I am so thankful. As John Newton said in the movie, "I am a great sinner, and God is a great Savior." Save me.

If you haven't seen the movie, I highly encourage you to! Especially to the end. At the very end of the movie, there is a beautiful version of the song. I can't find it on youtube, so you'll have to watch the movie yourself. It's pretty incredible!

I'll update you more on life in a later post. For now, rest in His grace. It's pretty amazing...

Blessings!

Real Life

Vacation has officially ended.  Real life has started once again.  So sad...

Linda left on Monday.  It was very sad to see her go!  I didn't like it one bit!  We had tons of fun, and she helped me move (yet again!)  Next time, I'm going to help her move up here!  Wouldn't that be so great!  

Like I said, Linda moved me all in.  I have a new house, new roommates, and a whole new adventure waiting for me.  This house has a full front and backyard - so good!  I mowed and worked on the front lawn yesterday.  Four nasty, itchy bug bites and a sunburn later, I decided that morning is the best time to work on the yard.  It's actually been really warm here the past few days!  I've been really surprised!  The people here in Juneau are starting to get cranky because there hasn't been rain in almost a week!  Everyone has tans - it's pretty funny!

Work is ok.  I recently got promoted to supervisor, which is a new adventure too!  I start in two weeks.  I'm nervous, because there is still so much that I don't know.  But, it will be experience and a new adventure.

I've decided that I can't ease into things.  I can't make just one change at a time in my life - it's all or nothing!  I did it last year: graduated, new house, new job, new roommate, new state all in one month.  This year: new house, three new roommates, new position, new friends all in one month!  Won't it be interesting to see what happens next year?!  

I miss you all!  Hope all is well with you! 

Blessings,

Laurie