Sing Alleluia

An entry from my personal journal:

"I never thought that something on cable TV would bless me and bring me to such tears.  No, I didn't cry much.  But wow...

"There are so many reasons I can't wait to get to heaven, and the greatest will always be to see Jesus face to face and be with Him physically, for all of eternity.  I can't even wrap my mind around that...It's going to be awesome!  I can't wait to see my grandpa again, and all the other people I miss - friends and family.  I can't wait to talk to the martyrs and hear their stories.  And I get to do this forever...what a blessing!

"I was watching 'The Best of the Dove Awards' on cable tonight.  Sure, there were artists and songs I didn't much care for and that I would rather not listen to you.  But there was one point where the whole audience was singing  God praise and worshiping Him.  It was beautiful!  Even as I think about it, it brings tears to my eyes.  There, in a room filled with professional musicians, all singing together in harmony in worship!  Wow...Never have I heard a more beautiful sound.  I can only imagine that heaven will be just like that!  I get to sing with all the professionals and worship with them!  And I can't wait!"

It's about 11:30pm as I write this, and my heart is so full and so happy that I can't sleep!  This song I've put on the blog is the one I've been listening to and singing with all night long.  I want to dance and belt it out!  I should...my roommate is not around...

I hope you are blessed tonight.

Simplicity

Wow...It's been quite some time since my last blog!  Lot's has happened, and at the same time, there's not a whole lot to tell.

I got a bed!  That's right, I'm now sleeping on a genuine mattress instead of the hard floor!  Let's just say this was one of the best purchases I have ever made!  I love going to bed!  And now, if any of you ever come to visit (hint hint) you'll have a place to sleep!  This is a good thing!  And with the bed came the rearranging of my room.  Now, it still has work to do for when Linda gets up here, but it's a start.  Another good thing.

Work continues to be crazy.  This past week I worked eight straight days because my schedule was switching around.  Let's see.  In the past eight days, I have dealt with:

• Two girls cutting themselves
• A suicide note
• A girl barricading herself in a room, non-responsive
• Six girls PMSing all at once
• Six girls with extremely rude, defiant and annoying behaviors

Sound like fun?  Anyone want my job?  Needless to say, I'm SO glad for two days off!  I need it badly!   I'm happy to report the two girls cutting themselves have stopped, for now, and are doing much better.  The girl that had barricaded herself in the room for three hours is also doing much better and is her "happy, normal" self again.  Poor thing - she even went to each of the staff and her peers to apologize for her behaviors!  She really is a sweet girl.  And the suicide note girl has a plan for when she gets sad again, so hopefully we'll be alright there.  Never a dull moment!

This past week, it snowed about 12 inches.  Yikes!  When will the snow stop???  Answer: never.  I seriously don't think it will ever stop.  I can only hope...It's raining now, so that's a sign of warmer weather.  

I must say, I've enjoyed this day just sitting in PJ's, with a hot cup of tea, watching LOST, and listening to the rain.  There's not a whole lot more peaceful.

Which reminds me, LINDA - YOU'RE DEAD!  Linda, my dear sister, told me to watch LOST.  So being the wonderful sister I am, I did.  And it makes me angry.  Seriously.  I hate the show - it makes no sense!  But I can't stop watching it because I have to know what happens.  That's the dumb part.  Any normal person would just say, "this is dumb, and I'm not going to waste my time on a show that doesn't make sense."  Apparently, I am not a normal person and cannot do that.  GRRRRR...

I'm currently reading the book "All I Ever Needed to Know, I Learned in Kindergarden".  It's a great book.  Makes you think about the simple things in life.  It's a book of thoughts about common things.  Easy read - I suggest reading it!  It's made me look at life up here.  How different it is in Juneau to Riverside.  Some of the things are big things, but some are the small things: how you can go to the store and see at least five people you know at any given time; how the fastest speed limit is 55 mph; how when there is an avalanche, everyone rushes to help; how people know how to appreciate the weather.  That's probably the biggest one. 

I hate the snow.  Mark, my landlord, loves the snow.  He says that the snow is like God cleansing out all the bad and making it white, just like the snow.  He says it is a purifying that happens every year and gets us ready for the new year.  I look at it and see a mess and a driving hazard.  But that's the type of things people up here see.  When it's sunny outside, people call in sick at work just so they can go outside and enjoy the sun!  They've learned to look at the beauty everywhere and in every situation.  I love that!  It's something I can learn as well...

Hope all you are doing well!  I miss you, and for those of you in So Cal, I'll get to see you in about 45 days!!!

Love you!

Blessings!

I Want to be Beautiful...

Time for a "girlie" post?  My guess is that most of you will laugh, but hey - I can live with a few laughs...ha!

It's been a tough week at work.  One of my girls and I are not getting along much at all.  I can't seem to win with her!  I try and try, but it's just no good.  Sunday night's journal (the girls have to write a journal each night processing through their day.  The journals are a "safe" place for them to express themselves explicitly - they can swear and write whatever they're thinking) had a few choice words for me bringing up all the things she hates about me.  I consider myself a pretty strong person, but when I go to work each day and get the evil eye, muttering under the breath, and the hate journals, it gets to wear on me.  It hurts!  I can't pretend that I don't have feelings - I do.  But the girls don't remember this - they don't remember that we're human as well.  We do make mistakes!  We do have feelings!  We have bad days too!  It's a lot to live up to.

I haven't been able to talk to many people back home this past week either because I've been sick and trying to sleep it off and get my voice back (good news - it's back!).  Not talking to friends is REALLY hard, especially when your week is not so good.  I miss them!  I miss my family!  I need a hug...

I'm reading the book Captivating right now.  It's a book about looking into the heart of a woman.  I've been journaling throughout the book, and trust me, I've learned a lot!  Even when it's hard to admit, I have been accepting this for the past week: I want to be beautiful!  I want to be someone who shines.  I want to show people love.  I want to be enough for the folks I come into contact with.  I want someone to tell me, "you are beautiful.  I think you are beautiful."  Sounds selfish...but it's especially true when I've had a week like the one I just had.  I don't feel beautiful.  I don't feel like I'm enough.  I don't feel like I'm shining.  Sometimes, I just need to be reminded of it.

So if you're bored, send me an email or give me a call!  I have a voice now, so I can actually talk!  I may cough in your ear, but I have a voice!

I love you all!

Blessings!

Juneau Crud

Sound fun?  Let me tell you, it's not.  It's basically the common cold but kick the not feeling good about 50% higher and you've got Juneau Crud.  My roommate has had it for that past two weeks and is still not over it.  This is not good.

But, here's the great thing about Juneau Crud: I get to sit on the couch all day and watch 24!  And no one judges me because I'm sick and you can't judge a sick person.  So I'm in my comfy clothes with my hot tea, under my t-shirt blanket, and enjoying 24.  Still debating whether or not to call in sick for work tomorrow...maybe I should...

It's still snowing outside.  Actually, I just looked out the window, and at the present moment, it's not snowing.  But it will - the sky is grey and white.  I think someone on the radio reported that we've gotten over 130 inches of snow since October.  Figures.  The winter I come up, they get a record amount of snow.  ;-)

I ran errands today - mostly just to get allergy and sinus medicine.  Went over to the Harris' house to check the mail and got to play with Marina for a bit (Marina is their dog).  Marina was SO excited to see someone (they're gone for a couple weeks) and was jumping around in the snow and biting the snow.  She was so fun.  She gave me the puppy dog sad eyes as I was leaving. 

Sorry to report that there is not a whole lot more to report on!  Life is pretty much the same up here.  For those of you who read this blog, write me questions that I can answer!  I love questions!  You can put them in the comments section of this blog, or email me.  

Wow, this blog is kinda scrambled.  I must be sick.  Time to get a refill on tea and turn on 24.  I love you all and miss you tons!

Blessings!

Guess that Song

This is a note that someone did on Facebook, and I thought it was great. Don't forget to read and post on the other blog I did earlier today!

Step 1: Put your music player on shuffle

Step 2: Post the first line from the first 25 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing

Step 3: Strike through the songs when someone guesses both artist and track correctly

Step 4: Looking them up on Google or any other search engine is CHEATING!

1. Prepare ye the way of the Lord! - Prepare ye the Way by Godspell

2. Fifteen minutes left to throw me together - Settlin' by Sugarland

3. He drowns in his dreams, an exquisite extreme, I know - Beautiful Disaster by Kelly Clarkson

4. You'll walk unscathed through musket fire - My Ain True Love by Alison Krauss

5. Everyday more wicked! Everyday the terror grows! - Thank Goodness by Wicked!

6. It's not hard to know what you're thinking - Fade to Grey by Jars of Clay

7. I woke up this morning - there was rain in the sky - Love Will Save the Day by Geoff Moore and the Distance

8. Lord you have my heart, and I will search for yours - Lord you have my heart by Delirious?

9. Don't be afraid, you'll be alright

10. Who is this King of Glory who pursues me with his love - King of Glory by Third Day

11. Every now and then on my way home

12. Grandma burned the biscuits, nearly took the house down with it - Eillsworth by Rascal Flatts

13. When the music fades into the past

14. Think of me, think of me fondly - Think of me by Phantom of the Opera

15. I can think why you think you belong to me

16. Lift your gaze, be lifted up

17. Mama please don't go, won't you stay here for one more day

18. An only child alone and wild - Leader of the Band by Dan Fogelberg

19. I'll fly away old glory - I'll fly away by Jars of Clay

20. All my world, all I've lost, the wrecks I've made here

21. Shepherd, your sheep are weary

22. Here I am Lord and I'm drowning - East to West by Casting Crowns

23. Well I've been around for a pretty good while

24. What will be left when I draw my last breath

25. Don't ride your bike off a ramp that's more than three bricks high - Don't Ask Me How I Know by Bobby Pinson

Have fun!

It's About Time...

                                                        Sunset up here...Beautiful!
                                             The infamous tree in the lake picture
                                                Sunrise from my bedroom window
                                                    More of the same

Although I'm convinced not many people still read this, a few of you have asked about an update and more pictures.  I'm not sure what you want to know.  Not much has happened! 

The last few days has been really warm - like in the 50's!  It's been beautiful.  I guess we were getting spoiled.  Today, I woke up and it's snowing hard outside.  They say by the time that this storm passes, it'll leave 15 inches on the ground.  Not fun.  But I'm enjoying sitting at my computer with my cup of Yorkshire tea, listening to music, under my blanket, and watching the snow fall outside.  Doesn't get much better than that.

Speaking of music, I've found a song that I love.  It's a new Chris Tomlin song called "I Will Rise".  You can YouTube it.  It's fantastic. 

Work is still work.  I just finished MAB training (Managing Aggressive Behavior) last week.  Basically, it taught me how to put aggressive people in "therapeutic" holds so that they can't hurt anyone.  I'm not sure what is therapeutic about the holds, but that's what I was told.  I can't wait to go home and get my brother...

Here's a funny story about one of my girls.  We'll call her AM.  AM always has a bad attitude about anything new.  She'll even tell you, "I don't try anything new.  It's scary."  So one night, I decide that I'm going to teach the girls Nertz (many of you know this evil game...).  AM says, "I hate card games. I'm not going to play!  You always think of the least fun things to do!"  I tell AM that she is not required to enjoy the game, but she is required to try the game.  Just two hands, I tell her.  So with a poor attitude, she sets up the game and says, "OK! I'M READY! TEACH ME!"  Ignoring her disrespect and attitude, I explain to everyone the game and take it slow the first hand.  After someone yells, "NERTZ!" we separate the cards.  AM says, "K, one more hand, right?  I think I can do this without help."  So we deal out again, play a "real" game, and when someone yells "NERTZ!" again, the game stops and we separate cards again.  I tell AM thank you for trying the game, and that she can go do some quiet work time if she wants.  Her response: "Hell no! I love this game!  I'm going to keep playing this!  K, deal again!"  I had to bite my tongue to keep from saying, "I told you so!"  Since that day, she has taught every staff "Snertz" and plays it at every chance she gets.  However, she refuses to learn any other card game because "Snertz is the only card game I like.  I don't like playing cards and you don't know any fun games."  Ah well, maybe one day she'll learn to trust me...

Another funny story about AM.  One Saturday, I got the PLEASURE of taking three teenage girls shopping for "fun" stuff.  Any of you that know me well know shopping is probably my least favorite thing to do.  When you add three teenage girls, you have a recipe for disaster.  Anyways.  The other staff that's on duty with me talk about who will get to go shopping.  AM was in the running, but had a rough morning.  It got even worse when she wasn't turning her morning around and was told she may not get to go shopping.  To say she was upset was an understatement.  She said, "I'm going outside to shovel the driveway.  Don't bother me!"  She was out for a while, and the driveway was completely shoveled!  Pretty soon, she comes in with a big grin on her face and says, "Laurie!  Come out and see what I did!"  I go outside, very curious, and she leads me to my car.  OK, when the plows come and plow the roads, they don't care if there is a car parked on the side of the road - they'll just burm you in.  So, AM being the wonderful girl she is, completely dug me out and made a path for me to get my car out!  She is grinning from ear to ear and is so proud of herself.  From that moment on, she is great!  So, because she turned her attitude around - not because she dug me out, she got to go shopping and was very happy!

That's pretty much my life up here right now.  Enjoying as best I can!  Hope you all are doing well!  Miss you and love you tons!

Blessings!

Who approved the ice?

Picture of DeHart's, a local "7-11" with six foot icicles!!!
My car in my driveway.  This was the morning after it snowed two feet.  When I opened my car door, it pushed snow out of the way...not fun to drive in...
Icicles at Lighthouse.  The girls loved this.

So, the last few days have been interesting.  It's gone from snowing two feet and about 18 degrees outside to pouring down rain and about 40 degrees outside.  The warm weather (yes, 40 degrees IS warm!) is starting to melt the snow, so the berms are getting smaller.  Problem is, it gets to freezing at night, so all the millions of puddles of water is turning to ice.  This, let me tell you, is not fun to walk in, drive in, live in, etc.  Who approved this?  I am enjoying the warmer weather though (never thought I'd say that...) and enjoying the clear skies.  It's getting beautiful again!

Work is still going well.  I'm loving the girls and the challenges they throw at me.  Monday was a fun day...we had three of the six girls have full on blow-outs - that means they lost their tempers, storming around, yelling, swearing, not listening to anyone, etc.  It was quite the adventure.  Luckily I had the next two days off...One of our girls is going home sometime this week, so we're getting another new one.  This is kinda scary because the house will be "young" meaning they are all so new to the program and will have meltdowns easier.  So it's going to be pretty high-stress for the next few months.  Be in prayer for all of us!

Other than that, I don't really have any fun stories.  Just hanging out, trying to keep connected with folks at home, and trying to enjoy life in Alaska.  Hope you are all doing well!  Miss you terribly!

Blessings!